Somewhere In The Middle


I found myself in a familiar situation last week.  I guess I should be used to it by now.

I sat, perched uncomfortably on the exam table, trying to explain to my doctor why my thyroid doctor isn’t concerned about my levels.  His eye roll clued me into the problem: “I know you don’t believe in this – your doctor doesn’t believe in this …” he told me, “but conventional medicine says your levels are the problem.”  I spluttered “wait, I DO believe in conventional medicine ….” and then stopped.  Because he wasn’t listening.  He was done.

I left, again with no answers.   All because I’m stuck somewhere in the wasteland between Functional and Conventional medicine.

The more we know … 

When you live in a medically complex family like ours, you eventually accept that conventional medicine doesn’t have all the answers.  In fact, they only have some of the answers, and they only run a few of the tests.  Over and over and over, and if they keep coming back fine, then you’re fine, right?  Wrong.

It’s not just the medical field.  It’s the vision field – vision therapy is a hoax, right?  Well, the hoax is working for our son at the moment and his reading ability is improving.

It’s science as well – sensory processing disorder is just laziness or a side effect of Autism, right?  Wrong.  Science is finally catching up to what we parents already know with new studies.  It’s a neurological difference.   Duh!


The problem isn’t any of these fields.  The problem is people who can’t look outside of the box of “normal.”




Normal is like the elusive “one-size-fits-all.”  It doesn’t exist.  Because people are so different, with varying needs, desires, abilities, and limits.   My gifted kids are a prime example of this.  They’re definitely not normal by any stretch of the imagination.  They’re smart, they’re advanced, they’re emotional explosions waiting to happen, and they’re ticking sensory time bombs.  We don’t fit in any box.

I’m left wondering – does anyone actually fit in the box?  Or is it just that some of us fake it better than others?



Not me

I’ve never been good at faking, and neither are my kids.  We are who we are, ticking time bombs and all.  I’m ok with that.  It seems that most people are not.  Whatever happened to accepting people for who they are instead of trying to look perfect?    I’m not perfect.  I’ll never be perfect!


I’m not the perfect mom.  I do the best I can.

I’m not physically perfect, and I never was even at my pinnacle as a young teen.

I’m not a perfect wife.  I do try to do better, to communicate more, and to be patient.

I’m a horrible housekeeper, because I physically can’t.  Judge my dust bunnies, go ahead!

I’m not the best teacher – I have no experience or training.  But I’m willing to say “I don’t know” and learn.


We’re somewhere in the middle of everything.  One foot on one side of the fence, the other foot on the other side.  My world is full of ‘maybe‘ and ‘possibly,‘ not ‘yes‘ or ‘no.’  I think that’s normal.  Don’t you?





  1. Amen! We believed our conventional ophthalmologist that my son’s eye-teaming issue “wasn’t that bad” and “you can try vision therapy but it doesn’t work” for far too long. Finally got him to a developmental ophthalmologist who realized everything son saw at reading distance was doubled. Eight short weeks of vision therapy fixed him right up! Just think how much more confident he would have been at school if he’d gotten that therapy in 2nd grade instead of 7th!


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